- Thu, 06:10: So TIRED! Something (???) woke me @ around 4:35 AM, & I've been sitting here trying to go back to sleep for nearly 90 min now. 😴 Need Sleep!
- Thu, 06:14: Finally ready to doze off, but there's ONLY 56 min until my alarm goes off to get Dini ready for school. NOT GOOD. So tired. So sad.😢 Need 😴
- Thu, 07:20: https://t.co/kIVlcNHcfd
I'm starving for love and affection. Nothing I seem to do, or say, makes any difference. I'm losing hope. Worse yet, I'm starting not to care. Some days I just want to walk out and keep on going. But I love her too much. I love my children too much. I just want some of that love to come back to me in ways that make me feel validated and important.
We need a romantic getaway.
I need to get off my duff and get serious about my traveling plans for karen and I this year. Make it something to spark some "mojo" between us. Not just a local hotel, or a night where we ship the kids off to one of the G-Ma's houses. We need to actually PACK our BAGS and GO somewhere, trip.
That's why I have picked somewhere that we would not normally think about going to on the spur of the moment. A destination that we would both want to go to, but not necessarily want to take the kids (example Washington DC - that's a family trip). We need to go somewhere where the WOW factor will be super fun and exciting. And it doesn't hurt that is is one of the top locations on my travel bucketlist.
After my trip to SD with the scouts, I began researching a couple of options for Karen and I to take a trip this year, and decided I have always really wanted to see NY. Given the fact that I may not have a job next year (and next year will be an out of council summer camp for scouts) I need to make this year count. So the Big Apple it is.
This will be the first kids free trip we've made together (not including Steve & Crystal's wedding, which doesn't count) since Jack was only one year old, in 2005. (Nearly 12 years ago)
I wish we already had our Tax return money. I'm willing to drive, but flying for two would be easier. We could go to:
When we get our tax return, and pay down our credit card debt, I'm going to start taking the money I have been paying out to the credit cards and put it towards a savings fund, to go to New York right after the kids get out of school in May. I'll even borrow from my 401K if I have to.
We NEED this trip together. I NEED THIS TRIP. We can go for Karen's birthday weekend (which will be a surprise, since it will probably mean skipping Camporee) or the next weekend which includes Memorial weekend (adding a day that I wouldn't have to burn from VAC days), right before Summer Camp. If I can't get it planned for one of those weeks, I'll have to wait for mid June.
I LOVE IT! I'm so excited, I can't even hardly contain myself right now. As much as I would like to, I know I won't really be able to make this trip a surprise. I'm going to need help planning it. As soon as we get our tax return, I'm going to hard sell this idea to Karen, and I can't see any reason why she would say no. In fact, I refuse to take "no" for an answer.
I know she has been wanting to go back to NY, and I want to go too. She's talked about taking me there ever since we started dating. (And since it has been literally like 25 years since she graduated high school, and went on her Senior trip, we can ignore the "been there/done that" sloppy seconds rule)
LMAO! I feel so much better right now!
I started this entry off feeling so very depressed and even hopeless; and now I'm finishing it on an emotional high. I'm so excited I just want to scream, sing, and dance. This is going to be better than when we went to Naples, FL for President's Club.